wandering thoughts

I am writing this while I’m in class right now. My students are doing a worksheet to review for their monthly test on Thursday, and I am ridiculously bored. In fact, they are too. One of them just made a farting noise with his armpit. Gross.

Things here are fine, but busy. My Dad and brother are coming to Shanghai on Saturday, and I’ve got about a million and a half things to get done before they get here. Tomorrow I’m giving two monthly tests, and Thursday I’m giving two more. I have to have everything graded and in the computer by next Tuesday, but for obvious reasons I’d like to get it all done by Friday night.

Other than that, everything is pretty much the same. I teach from 8-4 (well, realistically I get to the office closer to 8:30/8:45, unless it’s Wednesday and I have to teach first period). And of course by saying I ‘teach full time’ I mean that I am in the classroom for about 20 hours per week and talking online and/or surfing the internet for the other 20 hours.

Anyway, it’s weird that I’ve got less than 6 weeks left here. On the one hand, it feels like I’ve been here for so long that most things have lost their shock value or surprise. It just feels so normal most of the time to be living in China. It’s gotten to the point where I know what to buy at the grocery store, I no longer am afraid to go places on my own (like my first 2 or so months here), and I don’t wake up every morning being like ‘oh yeah , I live in China. It’s just normal. Except last week when I opened my cab door directly into a guy on a bike. He was fine, but the cab door sort of wasn’t. The guy and the cab driver were both furious and I was the stupid foreigner who could say nothing more than ‘I’m sorry’ in Chinese, over and over. God that was horrible.

On the other hand (there’s always another hand, isn’t there?), being home for 5 days reminded me of the differences between here and there. Yes, you can get most things that you use at home here in China, and often for less money. But at home at the grocery store, there were so many more choices…so much more pre-prepared food (such as pre-washed salads, cut up fruit, frozen meals, granola bars, etc).. China IS dirty, and actually being able to see the stars at home made me more sentimental than I expected. Maybe that’s why I’ve been obsessed with the song “Passenger Seat” by Death Cab for Cutie lately. Or maybe I’m just weird. People are different, too. Manners in China are far different from in the US or other western countries. I’m looking forward to not being shoved while waiting in line for an ice cream. And granted, I’m writing about sort of trite differences between the two countries…I know that. But I don’t feel like writing more about the bureaucracy right now, partially because I’m lazy and partially because I don’t necessarily feel its effects every single day. Blah this is just me thinking while typing. sorry if it's not totally coherent.

It’s hard to give the thing that’s ending your full attention when you are rapidly and constantly preparing for the thing that is going to begin. In this case, I mean moving in with Mike, moving to Chicago, and law school. It’s hard not to spend so much time thinking about the future that you forget about the present.

That being said, I’m going to a great Indian restaurant tonight to celebrate my friend’s birthday. Today I found myself pulling a Travis from his senior year and telling one of my friends “You only have 6 more weekends to hang out with me.” So I’m going to do my best to be as social as I can and spend time with all of these people who have helped shape my experience so much. Plus, there are still tons of touristy things in Shanghai that I still have somehow managed to avoid. Hopefully I’ll get to see some of the stuff while my dad and brother are visiting. Anyway, that’s all for now.

um...ew.

after a long afternoon of shopping, we decided to further reward ourselves with a delicious mexican dinner at Taco Popo. It was decent (for chinese mexican food) and relatively cheap. Shannon got up to go to the bathroom before we left, as we were paying the bill.

As she was exiting the bathroom, she stopped short. I saw her stare in teh direction of the kitchen for a few seconds, before she turned to us and said, 'I just saw a rat.'

i tell you, nothing makes your meal sit in your stomach funny quite like that sentence. Ew.

a little stressed

Well, the May holiday came and went, and I had a great visit at home. Mike picked me up from the airport (he had a burrito from BTB waiting for me in the car) and basically from that moment forward we were busy nonstop. The visit included dinner with my family, dinner with his family, celebrating my mom's bday, hanging out with one of Mike's friends in Royal Oak, meeting Mike's grandpa, hanging out with Rebecca, me cooking fajitas, and culminated in an awesome birthday party for Mike on Saturday at his house in Ferndale. It was really awesome spending time with Mike (although 5 days is WAY too short a visit considering the amount of stuff we had to do), wonderful seeing my family (minus Gabe, who was busy in Chicago), and obviously fantastic to see so many of my friends. Even though a lot has changed in the past 8 months, at the core the people are the same, which is always comforting. I felt like my visit home was a nice little preview of what this upcoming summer might be like.

At this point, I have 54 days left in Shanghai. I should be super excited about enjoying my last two months here (well, a little less than 2 months) and taking full advantage of what the city has to offer me. Maybe it’s just the jet lag, and the fact that I’m crabby because of it, but I don’t know if I could be less excited about being here right now. Getting back into teaching was almost painful yesterday. But it’s really nice when my students do things that make me smile. For example, one of my students sits next to the window in English class, right by the chain to pull the blinds closed. He has a pencil case that is furry and is in the shape of a koala, and likes to make a noose for his koala out of the chain for the blinds. Perhaps it’s a bit morbid, but this kid is hilarious and so incredibly cute. Today he’s wearing a necklace that says ‘hot’ on it.

I’m definitely looking forward to my dad and brother’s visit. 16 days until that happens. Can you tell that I like countdowns?

I guess part of the issue is that I’m so stressed out about the law school situation. At this point I’ve turned down American and George Mason, deciding to send in a deposit only to Chicago-Kent (where I got the full-tuition scholarship). I’m currently waitlisted at U of M and UCLA, and technically at George Washington, if I send in the postcard saying that I want to stay on the waitlist. I don’t want to stay on the waitlist. I’ve had enough of waitlists. At this point, I wish I wasn’t waitlisted anywhere because I’m sick of waiting and I don’t want to have to make a decision if I do hear anything from either of those two schools. Yes, that’s a really immature outlook. But I am seriously so stressed out because my decision (which I probably won’t even have to make) will affect more than just me. I get super stressed out just thinking about it. Argh.

So anyway, it’s looking like I will probably be in Chicago next year, but it’s not 100% for sure. I wish I could say I was thrilled and excited about it, but there are just so many other ‘what-ifs’ that I’m having a hard time getting excited about anything. Blah.

I think it’s just hard being back here after having such a great week at home. I promise my next entry will be more uplifting.